October 12, 2008

A Pumpkin Patch of Our Very Own

While the economy continues to take a dive and businesses all around are going under, we are pleased to announce that business is booming for us and our production is up 600%. Our pumpkin production that is. Statistically speaking, a 600% increase is not hard to achieve when your original yield was 1. So you can do the math to realize that our little pumpkin patch has yielded a whopping 6 pumpkins this year!

What is the secret to our success? Very simple. Love. Literally. In years past I have toiled and researched reasons why our little patch would produce a meadow full of vines and only one little pumpkin. This year the pumpkins were under the complete care of the children and the magical growth element was love. Not the meticulous soil analyzing, fertilizing and consistent watering kind of love. Love came in the form of constant poking of the pumpkins, prodding, soft and kind words, studying them, rubbing them, marveling at every stage of growth and telling them how amazing they looked. All that love paid off as the kids went and proudly harvested their patch. Now the pumpkins have been adequately tricked into believing they are loved, we will soon take great stabs at them with a very large knife and carve away [insert evil laugh]. I'm just excited for the $40 I have saved from not having to go to Cox farms to buy pumpkins!