December 19, 2014

It's All About the Accessories

Like the look?

It's the latest fashion accessory.

I call it no-eau-de-vomit.

I deal with vomit quite frequently in my special world.  God must be getting a chuckle out of that.  Of all of the things in life I detest the most, vomit ranks a solid #1.  So God gave me a vomit-filled life.  Bridger, either from his sensory reactivity or compromised and fragile health, vomits nearly daily.  Often, multiple times a day - and when he is sick, I just stop counting all together.

I discovered a brilliant little trick a couple years ago and have used it every time without fail.  I have a stash of disposable face masks reserved for these fun occasions and it makes clean up much more painless.  I loop these little puppies around my ears, roll up my sleeves, pull on my latex surgical gloves and tackle boy, bath, bed and bedding.  I spray some Lysol, remove my protective gear and no one is none the wiser what just went down in that little room.

It was my signature look today. . . all day long.

Eliza's signature accessory today was this. . .

Bridger's orthotics.

On days like today when Bridger is barefootin' it, his little sister takes advantage of the opportunity to don his orthotics.  Hard to see in this picture, but those little plastic braces are knee height and incredibly uncomfortable.  She is obsessed with them.  She straps them on and puts on his shoes and awkwardly clomps around sounding like Pinocchio for hours as she goes about her daily business.  I will occasionally find her stuck in Bridger's mobile stander (on right) or gait trainer that she will strap herself in and not be able to get out of.  Too embarrassed to call for help, she will just wait for me to find her to set her free to go clomping about again.  She cracks me up.  Who needs baby dolls and My Little Ponies when you have a wonderland full of unique playthings around here?

So, there are the highlights of our very draining day.

I have 10 bottles of different medicines lined up on my counter and syringes rotating through the line up right now.  I have tv trays and bowls with a chicken soup ring around the middle waiting for the dishwasher to magically empty itself.  I have vomit laundry cycled through at every available minute today and I am hoping to catch the guilty party who keeps throwing their snotty tissue balls on the ground instead of in the trash can.  I think if I just follow that clomping sound it might lead me to catch the prime suspect in the very act.

Today, we sure look great. Tomorrow we will look even better.  Really.  Want to know how I know that already? Because I chose a mask in a lovely shade of green to wear tomorrow. It will bring out the color of my eyes.  

You see, even in our pathetic haze of disgustingly sick, I can still follow the fashion trends - which right now, tell me its all about how I accessorize.